Why We Do These Things
6/27/10
Exactly one year ago today a pact was made and destiny was set in motion. The goal was to swim 2.4 miles, bike 112 miles, and then run 26.2 miles thus becoming an Ironman. Why… because we were dumb and were trying to be cool. Really! Why else do people take a chance and step outside their comfort zone? Usually because most people they know have not or can’t do it, and that just makes us feel cool. And so today’s experience began.

The characters: Josh- The rather confident young man that is said to possess no pain receptors; Jamie- The beautiful bride that WILL NOT be outdone by some cocky, arrogant man… even if it is her husband; Jeff- The Jester of the club who is said to have pedaled his way out of the womb; Mark- The disciplined, calculated, math geek, who back-stroked his way to a last place swim finish (in a Sprint Tri) just two short summers ago. The scene: The beautiful pine filled hills surrounding Lake Coeur d’Alene in Northern Idaho.

The Day: With a mass beach start of 2400 racers, the swim took on a scene straight out of “The Miracle of Life” (Don’t know it? We can have a quick screening once I get the Sex Ed. Permission forms signed by all of you). Once in the water, kicking, bumping, pulling, punching….were all apparently fair game. The water was rather choppy with some serious swells out father in the two loop course while the water temperature was a chilly 58 degrees (at least until you had a moment to insulate your suit with a little “pee-pee,” sorry Gary, your suit was rinsed out REALLY well). For the 2.4 mile swim, Josh had a satisfying 1:13, Jeff and Jamie, a stellar 1:17 and 1:22 respectfully, and Mark a 1:19 after sucking his thumb in fear for a few moments at the start. Once on the 112 mile bike ride, Jeff CutterStrong took over. Destroying Josh’s 5-minute lead in just 17 miles, the two stooges held hands and sang cumbiya for the next 25ish miles. This time was highlighted by Cutter bombing the down hills like he was an Oompa-Loompa strapped to a rocket (oh wait…), all the while striking up exuberant conversation with anyone who would listen. Josh pretended not to have trouble keeping up, while whimpering on the inside, as he could never admit to Jeff taking it to him like this! Mark strapped on his seat belt and rode a strategically calm ride while planning his running attack. Jamie smiled and glistened (girl’s don’t sweat I am told) while pretty in pink as she sang “the hills are alive, with the sound of….. me kicking everyone’s ass!” When T2 arrived, Jeff had smashed the course with a 5:47 (19+ mph on a hilly course!), Josh entered T2, 4 minutes back with a 5:57 bike, Mark came in with a 6:20 effort, and Jamie came in looking better than us ugly folk with an 8 hour ride. Out of T2, Jeff stopped to sign autographs which allowed Josh to take over the race lead by mile 2, Mark put on his dancing shoes and started prancing his way to a comeback, and Jamie did her hair and makeup before skipping off down the road. With temperatures rising to the 80 degree mark, the beautiful, lakeside course was as conflicting as kissing you sister (at least your kissing, but come on man!!). With Josh eyeing his sub-12 hour goal and Cutter finally off his rocket and no longer a threat to his ego, Josh settled into an easy pace he thought he could hold. With Jeff’s big lead on Mark out of T2, Mark had to run the day’s best marathon, a 4:25, in order to catch him, slap him on the ass, then pass Jeff at mile 21. He finished the race with a fate-displaying 12:22. This happens to be the exact time of Josh’s debut Ironman two years ago in Arizona. Sing with me now… “we are the best 4 friends that anybody had…” Josh held a strong 9-10 minute pace until he realized, at mile 21, that Joe was NOT there to yell at him, upon which he bonked so hard the barefoot guy (yes, there was one out there) had to give him a piggyback ride in order to limp in at a 14 minute pace and secure another second place split for the day with a 4:30 marathon. BUT, he did nail the sub-12 goal with a 31 minute PR and 11:51 race. Jeff, still gloating and giggling from his friend-bashing bike ride, had to settle for 3rd after a 5:07 marathon but with a PR 12:37 Ironman. Jamie started the marathon strong but when the 42 Imodium’s kicked in at mile 16, running became “poopy” and somewhat “nauseating.” She did have the “heart-warming” moment of the day when a little girl gave Jamie a necklace during the run (true story). Jamie ended up cruising, with a great smile, to a debut 15:30 Ironman and secured her spot in the “Hot-Ironwomen-Who-Are-Working-Moms-Of-Three-Hall-Of-Fame.”
In all, in was amazing and worth it in the same way childbirth is worth the pain! So why did we do it? Because we can. Because an Ironman is LIVING life. Because you truly don’t know what you are made of until you push past your limits and see what is left. Yes, there is the competitive component, and yes there is a cool factor… but once you are out there all alone it becomes a battle within yourself, and this is why we truly do these things! Do you have the confidence to believe in yourself? Can you turn those doubts into pride? Can you fight off the desire to give up? Can you exceed the physical expectations and limits you and everyone else has placed on you? Can you challenge yourself….and win?

ARE YOU AN IRONMAN?